Yesterday was Saturday September 5, 2026
EDITION #1305 This issue 5ยข
This is day 249 of 2026

Did You Know

  • Each year there are more than 40,000 toilet related injuries in the United States.

  • Before toilet paper was invented, French royalty wiped their bottoms with fine linen.

  • An earthquake on December 16, 1811 caused parts of the Mississippi River to flow backwards.

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  • A volcano has enough power to shoot ash as high as 50 km into the atmosphere.

  • All babies are color blind when they are born.

  • Crayola is a French word that means Oily chalk.

Quips

Our next song is: "Angels We Have Heard Get High."

Filed Under: Church Notices


Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and the deterioration of some of the older ones.

Filed Under: Church Notices


For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

Filed Under: Church Notices


Fun Book Titles

  • How to Feed Elephants
    - by P. Nutts

  • Falling from a Window
    - by Eileen Dowt

  • The Barber of Seville
    - by Aaron Floor

  • All Aboard!
    - by Abel Seamann

  • Neck Exercises
    - by G. Rarff

View More: Book Titles

Good Question

  • You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?

  • What will fall on the lawn first? An autumn leaf or a Christmas catalogue?

  • Everyone wants to ride with you in the limo. How come nobody will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

  • "Stars & Stripes Weekly", the United States Armed Forces newspaper is first published.

    Friday February 8, 1918

  • Filed Under: → War


  • "Monopoly" the board game goes on sale for the 1st time.

    Wednesday February 6, 1935

  • Filed Under: → Business & Industry


  • The 1st recorded race meet in England happens at Roodee Fields, Chester.

    Friday February 9, 1540

  • Filed Under: → Sports


Events

  • Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

    They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

    Thursday February 23, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

    According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

    Monday September 4, 2006

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

    Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

    Saturday February 18, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • If you refuse to be made straight when you are wet, you will not be made straight when you are dry.
    - African Proverb

  • When you have given nothing, ask for nothing.
    - Albanian Proverb

  • Until lions have their own historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify the hunter.
    - African Proverb

World Firsts

  • The 1st solo England to Australia flight takes off piloted by Bert Hinkler.

    Tuesday February 7, 1928

  • Filed Under: → Travel Section


  • The 1st recorded race meet in England happens at Roodee Fields, Chester.

    Friday February 9, 1540

  • Filed Under: → Sports


  • New Jersey issues its 1st U.S. railroad charter. The proprietors included the famous inventor John Stevens.

    Monday February 6, 1815

  • Filed Under: → Travel Section


View More: → World Firsts

Wise Words

  • It takes a village to raise a child.
    - African Proverb

  • When the mouth stumbles, it is worse than the foot.
    - African Proverb

  • Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors.
    - African Proverb

Filed Under: Wise Words

Good Question

  • Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

  • When a doctor doctors a doctor does the doctor doing the doctoring doctor as the doctor being doctored wants to be doctored, or does the doctor doing the doctoring doctor as he wants to doctor?

  • How come wrong numbers are never busy?

Filed Under: → Good Question