News Thats Used

Tuesday May 25, 2004

Even in death Irish comic genius Spike Milligan managed to have the last laugh. Two years after his death at his home in Sussex, England, the creator of "The Goon Show" has finally got the epitaph he wanted.

A headstone bearing the words "I told you I was ill" has been erected above his grave at St. Thomas's Church in Winchelsea, East Sussex. Sadly for more than two years after his death at the ...

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Each year there are more than 40,000 toilet related injuries in the United States.

About twenty-five percent of the population will sneeze when they are exposed to light.

Albert Einstein was offered the presidency of Israel in 1952, but he declined.

Quips

Our next song is: "Angels We Have Heard Get High."

Filed Under: Church Notices

The Minister unveiled the Church's new donations campaign on Sunday: "I upped my Pledge - Up Yours".

Filed Under: Church Notices

Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and the deterioration of some of the older ones.

Filed Under: Church Notices

Fun Book Titles

School Meals
- by R. E. Volting

Peek-a-Boo!
- by I. C. Hugh

The Barber of Seville
- by Aaron Floor

All Aboard!
- by Abel Seamann

Apologizing Made Simple
- by Thayer Thorry

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Good Question

How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes. Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same material?

How long will a floating point operation float?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

Richard Johnson is the 1st Vice President chosen by the United States Senate. It happened during the Van Buren administration.

Wednesday February 8, 1837

Filed Under: → Politics

Astronomical Society of Pacific holds its 1st meeting in San Francisco.

Thursday February 7, 1889

Filed Under: → Science

The 1st recorded race meet in England happens at Roodee Fields, Chester.

Friday February 9, 1540

Filed Under: → Sports

Events

A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

Saturday February 18, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths

The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

Monday September 4, 2006

Filed Under: → Deaths

Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

Thursday February 23, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths