Yesterday was Monday September 28, 2026
EDITION #1305 This issue 5ยข
This is day 272 of 2026

Did You Know

  • Alexander the Great and Julius Caesar were both epileptic.

  • An earthquake on December 16, 1811 caused parts of the Mississippi River to flow backwards.

  • Before toilet paper was invented, French royalty wiped their bottoms with fine linen.

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  • Crayola is a French word that means Oily chalk.

  • Alexander the Great and Julius Caesar were both epileptic.

  • Canada is an Indian word meaning Big Village.

Quips

This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

Filed Under: Church Notices


Our next song is: "Angels We Have Heard Get High."

Filed Under: Church Notices


The Minister unveiled the Church's new donations campaign on Sunday: "I upped my Pledge - Up Yours".

Filed Under: Church Notices


Fun Book Titles

  • All Aboard!
    - by Abel Seamann

  • Peek-a-Boo!
    - by I. C. Hugh

  • How to Feed Elephants
    - by P. Nutts

  • The Barber of Seville
    - by Aaron Floor

  • My Years in a Lunatic Asylum
    - by I. M. Nutty

View More: Book Titles

Good Question

  • When a doctor doctors a doctor does the doctor doing the doctoring doctor as the doctor being doctored wants to be doctored, or does the doctor doing the doctoring doctor as he wants to doctor?

  • If a fly has no wings would you call him a walk?

  • How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

  • Aurora Ski Club of Red Wing, Minnesota became the 1st United States Ski Club.

    Tuesday February 8, 1887

  • Filed Under: → Sports


  • The United States swears in its 1st female Secretary of Transportation, namely Elizabeth Dole.

    Monday February 7, 1983

  • Filed Under: → Travel Section


  • Autherine Lucy, the 1st black student admitted to University of Alabama, is expelled.

    Tuesday February 7, 1956

  • Filed Under: → Education


Events

  • Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

    They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

    Thursday February 23, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

    According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

    Monday September 4, 2006

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

    Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

    Saturday February 18, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you.
    - African Proverb

  • It takes a village to raise a child.
    - African Proverb

  • When the mouth stumbles, it is worse than the foot.
    - African Proverb

World Firsts

  • The 1st indoor 15' pole vault, completed by Cornelius Warmerdam, achieving 15 feet 3/8 inches.

    Saturday February 7, 1942

  • Filed Under: → Sports


  • New Jersey issues its 1st U.S. railroad charter. The proprietors included the famous inventor John Stevens.

    Monday February 6, 1815

  • Filed Under: → Travel Section


  • "Stars & Stripes Weekly", the United States Armed Forces newspaper is first published.

    Friday February 8, 1918

  • Filed Under: → War


View More: → World Firsts

Wise Words

  • When elephants fight, it is the grass who suffers.
    - African Proverb

  • Until lions have their own historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify the hunter.
    - African Proverb

  • Where there is no shame, there is no honor.
    - African Proverb

Filed Under: Wise Words

Good Question

  • Everyone wants to ride with you in the limo. How come nobody will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down?

  • You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes. Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same material?

  • How long will a floating point operation float?

Filed Under: → Good Question