News Thats Used

Saturday February 25, 2017

A good news newspaper called Good News was founded because its American proprietors believed people were tired of reading bad news. The bi-weekly paper refused to publish any bad news and only printed the good news.

After just 16 months in operation the paper closed down. But it stuck to its guns of publishing only good news to the bitter end and refused to announce its own failure - this would ...

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Buttermilk does not contain any butter.

A one ounce milk chocolate bar has 6 mg of caffeine.

Airports that are at higher altitudes require a longer airstrip due to lower air density.

Quips

The Senior Choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning, to join the Choir.

Filed Under: Church Notices

Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and the deterioration of some of the older ones.

Filed Under: Church Notices

Sign seen at a Hair Salon: We curl up and dye for you.

Filed Under: Signs

Fun Book Titles

My Years in a Lunatic Asylum
- by I. M. Nutty

Apologizing Made Simple
- by Thayer Thorry

School Meals
- by R. E. Volting

The Barber of Seville
- by Aaron Floor

How to Feed Elephants
- by P. Nutts

View More: Book Titles

Good Question

Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?

If a fly has no wings would you call him a walk?

If fire fighters fight fire and crime fighters fight crime, what do freedom fighters fight?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

Aurora Ski Club of Red Wing, Minnesota became the 1st United States Ski Club.

Tuesday February 8, 1887

Filed Under: → Sports

"Stars & Stripes Weekly", the United States Armed Forces newspaper is first published.

Friday February 8, 1918

Filed Under: → War

Astronomical Society of Pacific holds its 1st meeting in San Francisco.

Thursday February 7, 1889

Filed Under: → Science

Events

The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

Monday September 4, 2006

Filed Under: → Deaths

Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

Thursday February 23, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths

A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

Saturday February 18, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths