News Thats Used

Monday September 15, 2003

After eating an English missionary in 1867, contrite villagers in Fiji are now eating humble pie and want to say they are sorry. Reverend Thomas Baker, from Playden, East Sussex, was cooked and eaten by the people of the remote mountain village of Navatusila.

The only thing left of Mr. Baker, a clergyman with the Wesleyan Methodist Church, were his leather boots, and they even attempted to chew ...

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A person infected with the SARS virus has a 95% - 98% chance of recovery.

Buttermilk does not contain any butter.

Before toilet paper was invented, French royalty wiped their bottoms with fine linen.

Quips

Sign seen in a bar: "Those drinking to forget, please pay in advance."

Filed Under: Signs

Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking tonight at Calvary Methodist. Come hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.

Filed Under: Church Notices

The Vicar is on vacation. Massages can be given to the Church Secretary.

Filed Under: Church Notices

Fun Book Titles

Falling from a Window
- by Eileen Dowt

How to Feed Elephants
- by P. Nutts

The Barber of Seville
- by Aaron Floor

My Years in a Lunatic Asylum
- by I. M. Nutty

School Meals
- by R. E. Volting

View More: Book Titles

Good Question

How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

Why does an inspiring sight like a sunrise always have to take place at such an inconvenient time?

Everyone wants to ride with you in the limo. How come nobody will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

The first storm warnings for ships was issued by English Admiral, Robert Ritzroy.

Wednesday February 6, 1861

Filed Under: → Travel Section

France recognizes the United States of America and signs a treaty of aid in Paris; it's the 1st U.S. treaty.

Friday February 6, 1778

Filed Under: → War

The Beatles land at New York's JFK airport, for their 1st United States tour.

Friday February 7, 1964

Filed Under: → Entertainment

Events

The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

Monday September 4, 2006

Filed Under: → Deaths

A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

Saturday February 18, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths

Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

Thursday February 23, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths