News Thats Used

Saturday February 25, 2017

A good news newspaper called Good News was founded because its American proprietors believed people were tired of reading bad news. The bi-weekly paper refused to publish any bad news and only printed the good news.

After just 16 months in operation the paper closed down. But it stuck to its guns of publishing only good news to the bitter end and refused to announce its own failure - this would ...

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About twenty-five percent of the population will sneeze when they are exposed to light.

Canada is an Indian word meaning Big Village.

Before toilet paper was invented, French royalty wiped their bottoms with fine linen.

Quips

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

Filed Under: Church Notices

The Senior Choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning, to join the Choir.

Filed Under: Church Notices

Weight Watchers will meet at 7.30 pm at the Presbyterian Church. Please use the large double doors at the side entrance.

Filed Under: Church Notices

Fun Book Titles

All Aboard!
- by Abel Seamann

Apologizing Made Simple
- by Thayer Thorry

Falling from a Window
- by Eileen Dowt

My Years in a Lunatic Asylum
- by I. M. Nutty

How to Feed Elephants
- by P. Nutts

View More: Book Titles

Good Question

How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid of the dark to become a teenager who wants to stay out all night?

Can you repeat the part after "Listen very carefully"?

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

Edward of Caernarion, later Edward II, becomes the 1st Prince of Wales.

Monday February 7, 1301

Filed Under: → Miscellaneous

Autherine Lucy, the 1st black student admitted to University of Alabama, is expelled.

Tuesday February 7, 1956

Filed Under: → Education

The 1st indoor 15' pole vault, completed by Cornelius Warmerdam, achieving 15 feet 3/8 inches.

Saturday February 7, 1942

Filed Under: → Sports

Events

Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

Thursday February 23, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths

The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

Monday September 4, 2006

Filed Under: → Deaths

A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

Saturday February 18, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths