Yesterday was Monday August 31, 2026
EDITION #1305 This issue 5ยข
This is day 244 of 2026

Did You Know

  • All babies are color blind when they are born.

  • Alexander the Great and Julius Caesar were both epileptic.

  • Crayola is a French word that means Oily chalk.

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  • Airports that are at higher altitudes require a longer airstrip due to lower air density.

  • Alexander the Great and Julius Caesar were both epileptic.

  • All babies are color blind when they are born.

Quips

Our next song is: "Angels We Have Heard Get High."

Filed Under: Church Notices


Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking tonight at Calvary Methodist. Come hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.

Filed Under: Church Notices


The Minister unveiled the Church's new donations campaign on Sunday: "I upped my Pledge - Up Yours".

Filed Under: Church Notices


Fun Book Titles

  • Apologizing Made Simple
    - by Thayer Thorry

  • How to Feed Elephants
    - by P. Nutts

  • Falling from a Window
    - by Eileen Dowt

  • School Meals
    - by R. E. Volting

  • My Years in a Lunatic Asylum
    - by I. M. Nutty

View More: Book Titles

Good Question

  • You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes. Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same material?

  • How come wrong numbers are never busy?

  • Why does an inspiring sight like a sunrise always have to take place at such an inconvenient time?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

  • The 1st successful United States educational magazine "Academician", starts publishing in New York City.

    Saturday February 7, 1818

  • Filed Under: → Education


  • The United States swears in its 1st female Secretary of Transportation, namely Elizabeth Dole.

    Monday February 7, 1983

  • Filed Under: → Travel Section


  • Richard Johnson is the 1st Vice President chosen by the United States Senate. It happened during the Van Buren administration.

    Wednesday February 8, 1837

  • Filed Under: → Politics


Events

  • A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

    Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

    Saturday February 18, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

    According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

    Monday September 4, 2006

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

    They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

    Thursday February 23, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • Indecision is like a stepchild. If he does not wash his hands, he is called dirty, if he does, he is wasting water.
    - African Proverb

  • When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you.
    - African Proverb

  • It takes a village to raise a child.
    - African Proverb

World Firsts

  • Bruce McCandless of the United States, makes the 1st untethered space walk.

    Tuesday February 7, 1984

  • Filed Under: → Travel Section


  • New Jersey issues its 1st U.S. railroad charter. The proprietors included the famous inventor John Stevens.

    Monday February 6, 1815

  • Filed Under: → Travel Section


  • The first storm warnings for ships was issued by English Admiral, Robert Ritzroy.

    Wednesday February 6, 1861

  • Filed Under: → Travel Section


View More: → World Firsts

Wise Words

  • When elephants fight, it is the grass who suffers.
    - African Proverb

  • Listen or thy tongue will keep thee deaf.
    - American Indian Proverb

  • When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you.
    - African Proverb

Filed Under: Wise Words

Good Question

  • If fire fighters fight fire and crime fighters fight crime, what do freedom fighters fight?

  • Everyone wants to ride with you in the limo. How come nobody will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down?

  • Can you repeat the part after "Listen very carefully"?

Filed Under: → Good Question