Yesterday was Friday August 14, 2026
EDITION #1305 This issue 5ยข
This is day 227 of 2026

Did You Know

  • An earthquake on December 16, 1811 caused parts of the Mississippi River to flow backwards.

  • Crayola is a French word that means Oily chalk.

  • During World War II, Uncle Bens was the exclusive supplier of rice to the U.S. Armed Forces.

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  • Buttermilk does not contain any butter.

  • Each year there are more than 40,000 toilet related injuries in the United States.

  • All babies are color blind when they are born.

Quips

The Vicar is on vacation. Massages can be given to the Church Secretary.

Filed Under: Church Notices


Our next song is: "Angels We Have Heard Get High."

Filed Under: Church Notices


The Minister unveiled the Church's new donations campaign on Sunday: "I upped my Pledge - Up Yours".

Filed Under: Church Notices


Fun Book Titles

  • School Meals
    - by R. E. Volting

  • All Aboard!
    - by Abel Seamann

  • Peek-a-Boo!
    - by I. C. Hugh

  • How to Feed Elephants
    - by P. Nutts

  • My Years in a Lunatic Asylum
    - by I. M. Nutty

View More: Book Titles

Good Question

  • Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?

  • Everyone wants to ride with you in the limo. How come nobody will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down?

  • Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

  • Jean-Bertrand Aristide is sworn in as Haiti's 1st elected President.

    Thursday February 7, 1991

  • Filed Under: → Politics


  • The 1st appearance of cholera happens in Edinburgh, Scotland.

    Monday February 6, 1832

  • Filed Under: → Medicine


  • The 1st recorded race meet in England happens at Roodee Fields, Chester.

    Friday February 9, 1540

  • Filed Under: → Sports


Events

  • A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

    Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

    Saturday February 18, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

    According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

    Monday September 4, 2006

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

    They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

    Thursday February 23, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • Not to know is bad, not to wish to know is worse.
    - African Proverb

  • Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors.
    - African Proverb

  • When you have given nothing, ask for nothing.
    - Albanian Proverb

World Firsts

  • John Ames Sherman of Massachusetts, United States, patents the 1st envelope folding and gumming machine.

    Tuesday February 8, 1898

  • Filed Under: → Business & Industry


  • The 1st indoor 15' pole vault, completed by Cornelius Warmerdam, achieving 15 feet 3/8 inches.

    Saturday February 7, 1942

  • Filed Under: → Sports


  • "Stars & Stripes Weekly", the United States Armed Forces newspaper is first published.

    Friday February 8, 1918

  • Filed Under: → War


View More: → World Firsts

Wise Words

  • If you refuse to be made straight when you are wet, you will not be made straight when you are dry.
    - African Proverb

  • When elephants fight, it is the grass who suffers.
    - African Proverb

  • Listen or thy tongue will keep thee deaf.
    - American Indian Proverb

Filed Under: Wise Words

Good Question

  • Why do you need a drivers license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

  • Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

  • Everyone wants to ride with you in the limo. How come nobody will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down?

Filed Under: → Good Question