News Thats Used

Friday October 3, 2003

An Indian who was officially dead for 18 years and the scientists who invented Murphy's law were among the winners of the IgNobel Awards.

The awards are a spoof on the Nobel Prizes, celebrated annually in Boston to honor achievements that "cannot or should not be reproduced." They are presented by science humor magazine 'Annals of Improbable Research' and several groups at Harvard and Radcliffe ...

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Another name for a Microsoft Windows 98 tutorial was Crash Course!

Buttermilk does not contain any butter.

Before toilet paper was invented, French royalty wiped their bottoms with fine linen.

Quips

This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

Filed Under: Church Notices

At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?".
Come early and listen to the choir practice.

Filed Under: Church Notices

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

Filed Under: Church Notices

Fun Book Titles

Neck Exercises
- by G. Rarff

All Aboard!
- by Abel Seamann

The Barber of Seville
- by Aaron Floor

Peek-a-Boo!
- by I. C. Hugh

How to Feed Elephants
- by P. Nutts

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Good Question

Why do you need a drivers license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

If fire fighters fight fire and crime fighters fight crime, what do freedom fighters fight?

Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

Joe DiMaggio becomes the 1st $100,000 a year baseball player. He plays for the New York Yankees.

Monday February 7, 1949

Filed Under: → Sports

1st meeting of the Provisional Congress of Confederate States of America.

Wednesday February 6, 1861

Filed Under: → Politics

The Beatles land at New York's JFK airport, for their 1st United States tour.

Friday February 7, 1964

Filed Under: → Entertainment

Events

The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

Monday September 4, 2006

Filed Under: → Deaths

Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

Thursday February 23, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths

A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

Saturday February 18, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths