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EDITION #1305 This issue 5ยข
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Spike Milligan Has The Last Laugh

Used News Deaths

Tuesday May 25, 2004

Even in death Irish comic genius Spike Milligan managed to have the last laugh. Two years after his death at his home in Sussex, England, the creator of "The Goon Show" has finally got the epitaph he wanted.

A headstone bearing the words "I told you I was ill" has been erected above his grave at St. Thomas's Church in Winchelsea, East Sussex. Sadly for more than two years after his death at the ...

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Did You Know

  • All babies are color blind when they are born.

  • Before toilet paper was invented, French royalty wiped their bottoms with fine linen.

  • During World War II, Uncle Bens was the exclusive supplier of rice to the U.S. Armed Forces.

View More...

Latest Posts

Monday June 18, 2007

A Tibetan terrier named Arnie who went missing for nearly two years made his way home to his delighted family. Eleven-year-old Arnie, named after movie star Arnold Schwarzenegger, disappeared from the garden of his home near Bantry, County Cork, Ireland, 21 months ago.

His owner Gillian Singleton believed he was stolen for breeding purposes. She said her "happy, beautifully groomed dog" had bee ...

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Thursday March 6, 2008

Doctors delivered a stark ultimatum to a 39-year-old Englishman, who grew to a colossal 60 stone, 840 pounds. Colin Corfield's battle for survival was the subject of a poignant and moving ITV television documentary.

The Runcorn pub landlord in Cheshire was warned two years ago that his own body fat could suffocate him. So he decided to take drastic action and have risky gastric surgery. It has ...

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  • Each year there are more than 40,000 toilet related injuries in the United States.

  • Albert Einstein was offered the presidency of Israel in 1952, but he declined.

  • Alexander the Great and Julius Caesar were both epileptic.

Quips

Sign seen in a bar: "Those drinking to forget, please pay in advance."

Filed Under: Signs


Our next song is: "Angels We Have Heard Get High."

Filed Under: Church Notices


The Senior Choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning, to join the Choir.

Filed Under: Church Notices


Fun Book Titles

  • Falling from a Window
    - by Eileen Dowt

  • The Barber of Seville
    - by Aaron Floor

  • Apologizing Made Simple
    - by Thayer Thorry

  • All Aboard!
    - by Abel Seamann

  • School Meals
    - by R. E. Volting

View More: Book Titles

Good Question

  • What will fall on the lawn first? An autumn leaf or a Christmas catalogue?

  • How come wrong numbers are never busy?

  • Why do you need a drivers license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

  • "Monopoly" the board game goes on sale for the 1st time.

    Wednesday February 6, 1935

  • Filed Under: → Business & Industry


  • Aurora Ski Club of Red Wing, Minnesota became the 1st United States Ski Club.

    Tuesday February 8, 1887

  • Filed Under: → Sports


  • Bruce McCandless of the United States, makes the 1st untethered space walk.

    Tuesday February 7, 1984

  • Filed Under: → Travel Section


Events

  • A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

    Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

    Saturday February 18, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

    They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

    Thursday February 23, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

    According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

    Monday September 4, 2006

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • When the mouth stumbles, it is worse than the foot.
    - African Proverb

  • Indecision is like a stepchild. If he does not wash his hands, he is called dirty, if he does, he is wasting water.
    - African Proverb

  • Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors.
    - African Proverb

World Firsts

  • Aurora Ski Club of Red Wing, Minnesota became the 1st United States Ski Club.

    Tuesday February 8, 1887

  • Filed Under: → Sports


  • Richard Johnson is the 1st Vice President chosen by the United States Senate. It happened during the Van Buren administration.

    Wednesday February 8, 1837

  • Filed Under: → Politics


  • Jean-Bertrand Aristide is sworn in as Haiti's 1st elected President.

    Thursday February 7, 1991

  • Filed Under: → Politics


View More: → World Firsts

Wise Words

  • When the mouth stumbles, it is worse than the foot.
    - African Proverb

  • It takes a village to raise a child.
    - African Proverb

  • If you refuse to be made straight when you are wet, you will not be made straight when you are dry.
    - African Proverb

Filed Under: Wise Words

Good Question

  • Can you repeat the part after "Listen very carefully"?

  • If buttered toast always lands buttered side down and a cat always lands on its feet, what would happen if you tied a piece of buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped them both?

  • Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Filed Under: → Good Question