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EDITION #1305 This issue 5ยข
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Spike Milligan Has The Last Laugh

Used News Deaths

Tuesday May 25, 2004

Even in death Irish comic genius Spike Milligan managed to have the last laugh. Two years after his death at his home in Sussex, England, the creator of "The Goon Show" has finally got the epitaph he wanted.

A headstone bearing the words "I told you I was ill" has been erected above his grave at St. Thomas's Church in Winchelsea, East Sussex. Sadly for more than two years after his death at the ...

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Did You Know

  • An earthquake on December 16, 1811 caused parts of the Mississippi River to flow backwards.

  • Buttermilk does not contain any butter.

  • Before toilet paper was invented, French royalty wiped their bottoms with fine linen.

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Latest Posts

Monday June 18, 2007

A Tibetan terrier named Arnie who went missing for nearly two years made his way home to his delighted family. Eleven-year-old Arnie, named after movie star Arnold Schwarzenegger, disappeared from the garden of his home near Bantry, County Cork, Ireland, 21 months ago.

His owner Gillian Singleton believed he was stolen for breeding purposes. She said her "happy, beautifully groomed dog" had bee ...

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Monday June 18, 2007

A Tibetan terrier named Arnie who went missing for nearly two years made his way home to his delighted family. Eleven-year-old Arnie, named after movie star Arnold Schwarzenegger, disappeared from the garden of his home near Bantry, County Cork, Ireland, 21 months ago.

His owner Gillian Singleton believed he was stolen for breeding purposes. She said her "happy, beautifully groomed dog" had bee ...

Read All About It →
  • A person infected with the SARS virus has a 95% - 98% chance of recovery.

  • Canada is an Indian word meaning Big Village.

  • Albert Einstein was offered the presidency of Israel in 1952, but he declined.

Quips

Sign seen in a bar: "Those drinking to forget, please pay in advance."

Filed Under: Signs


Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of several new members and the deterioration of some of the older ones.

Filed Under: Church Notices


Our next song is: "Angels We Have Heard Get High."

Filed Under: Church Notices


Fun Book Titles

  • Peek-a-Boo!
    - by I. C. Hugh

  • The Barber of Seville
    - by Aaron Floor

  • All Aboard!
    - by Abel Seamann

  • My Years in a Lunatic Asylum
    - by I. M. Nutty

  • Neck Exercises
    - by G. Rarff

View More: Book Titles

Good Question

  • If there are 52 weeks in a year, how many weeks are there in a light year?

  • Why do you need a drivers license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

  • Everyone wants to ride with you in the limo. How come nobody will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

  • The 1st indoor 15' pole vault, completed by Cornelius Warmerdam, achieving 15 feet 3/8 inches.

    Saturday February 7, 1942

  • Filed Under: → Sports


  • Astronomical Society of Pacific holds its 1st meeting in San Francisco.

    Thursday February 7, 1889

  • Filed Under: → Science


  • The 1st recorded race meet in England happens at Roodee Fields, Chester.

    Friday February 9, 1540

  • Filed Under: → Sports


Events

  • A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

    Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

    Saturday February 18, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

    They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

    Thursday February 23, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

    According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

    Monday September 4, 2006

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • Until lions have their own historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify the hunter.
    - African Proverb

  • Indecision is like a stepchild. If he does not wash his hands, he is called dirty, if he does, he is wasting water.
    - African Proverb

  • When the mouth stumbles, it is worse than the foot.
    - African Proverb

World Firsts

  • The United States swears in its 1st female Secretary of Transportation, namely Elizabeth Dole.

    Monday February 7, 1983

  • Filed Under: → Travel Section


  • France recognizes the United States of America and signs a treaty of aid in Paris; it's the 1st U.S. treaty.

    Friday February 6, 1778

  • Filed Under: → War


  • Autherine Lucy, the 1st black student admitted to University of Alabama, is expelled.

    Tuesday February 7, 1956

  • Filed Under: → Education


View More: → World Firsts

Wise Words

  • When you have given nothing, ask for nothing.
    - Albanian Proverb

  • It takes a village to raise a child.
    - African Proverb

  • If you refuse to be made straight when you are wet, you will not be made straight when you are dry.
    - African Proverb

Filed Under: Wise Words

Good Question

  • If there are 52 weeks in a year, how many weeks are there in a light year?

  • When a doctor doctors a doctor does the doctor doing the doctoring doctor as the doctor being doctored wants to be doctored, or does the doctor doing the doctoring doctor as he wants to doctor?

  • How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

Filed Under: → Good Question