Yesterday was Friday July 31, 2026
EDITION #1305 This issue 5ยข
This is day 213 of 2026

Did You Know

  • A volcano has enough power to shoot ash as high as 50 km into the atmosphere.

  • A one ounce milk chocolate bar has 6 mg of caffeine.

  • Before toilet paper was invented, French royalty wiped their bottoms with fine linen.

View More...
  • An earthquake on December 16, 1811 caused parts of the Mississippi River to flow backwards.

  • Another name for a Microsoft Windows 98 tutorial was Crash Course!

  • A person infected with the SARS virus has a 95% - 98% chance of recovery.

Quips

Sign seen at a Hair Salon: We curl up and dye for you.

Filed Under: Signs


Our next song is: "Angels We Have Heard Get High."

Filed Under: Church Notices


Don't let worry kill you. Let the Church help.

Filed Under: Church Notices


Fun Book Titles

  • How to Feed Elephants
    - by P. Nutts

  • Neck Exercises
    - by G. Rarff

  • Apologizing Made Simple
    - by Thayer Thorry

  • Falling from a Window
    - by Eileen Dowt

  • My Years in a Lunatic Asylum
    - by I. M. Nutty

View More: Book Titles

Good Question

  • You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes. Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same material?

  • Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?

  • Everyone wants to ride with you in the limo. How come nobody will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

  • The first Guernsey Cattle Club organizes in New York City.

    Wednesday February 7, 1877

  • Filed Under: → Business & Industry


  • John Ames Sherman of Massachusetts, United States, patents the 1st envelope folding and gumming machine.

    Tuesday February 8, 1898

  • Filed Under: → Business & Industry


  • "Stars & Stripes Weekly", the United States Armed Forces newspaper is first published.

    Friday February 8, 1918

  • Filed Under: → War


Events

  • Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

    They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

    Thursday February 23, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

    According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

    Monday September 4, 2006

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

    Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

    Saturday February 18, 2017

  • Filed Under: → Deaths


  • If you refuse to be made straight when you are wet, you will not be made straight when you are dry.
    - African Proverb

  • Until lions have their own historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify the hunter.
    - African Proverb

  • When the mouth stumbles, it is worse than the foot.
    - African Proverb

World Firsts

  • "Stars & Stripes Weekly", the United States Armed Forces newspaper is first published.

    Friday February 8, 1918

  • Filed Under: → War


  • Bruce McCandless of the United States, makes the 1st untethered space walk.

    Tuesday February 7, 1984

  • Filed Under: → Travel Section


  • The Beatles land at New York's JFK airport, for their 1st United States tour.

    Friday February 7, 1964

  • Filed Under: → Entertainment


View More: → World Firsts

Wise Words

  • Until lions have their own historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify the hunter.
    - African Proverb

  • When elephants fight, it is the grass who suffers.
    - African Proverb

  • When you have given nothing, ask for nothing.
    - Albanian Proverb

Filed Under: Wise Words

Good Question

  • Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?

  • If buttered toast always lands buttered side down and a cat always lands on its feet, what would happen if you tied a piece of buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped them both?

  • Why do you need a drivers license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

Filed Under: → Good Question