News Thats Used

Saturday February 25, 2017

A good news newspaper called Good News was founded because its American proprietors believed people were tired of reading bad news. The bi-weekly paper refused to publish any bad news and only printed the good news.

After just 16 months in operation the paper closed down. But it stuck to its guns of publishing only good news to the bitter end and refused to announce its own failure - this would ...

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Another name for a Microsoft Windows 98 tutorial was Crash Course!

Airports that are at higher altitudes require a longer airstrip due to lower air density.

Each year there are more than 40,000 toilet related injuries in the United States.

Quips

The Vicar is on vacation. Massages can be given to the Church Secretary.

Filed Under: Church Notices

Sign seen at a Hair Salon: We curl up and dye for you.

Filed Under: Signs

Weight Watchers will meet at 7.30 pm at the Presbyterian Church. Please use the large double doors at the side entrance.

Filed Under: Church Notices

Fun Book Titles

My Years in a Lunatic Asylum
- by I. M. Nutty

Falling from a Window
- by Eileen Dowt

School Meals
- by R. E. Volting

How to Feed Elephants
- by P. Nutts

The Barber of Seville
- by Aaron Floor

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Good Question

How come wrong numbers are never busy?

Does killing time damage eternity?

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

Joe DiMaggio becomes the 1st $100,000 a year baseball player. He plays for the New York Yankees.

Monday February 7, 1949

Filed Under: → Sports

The 1st recorded race meet in England happens at Roodee Fields, Chester.

Friday February 9, 1540

Filed Under: → Sports

Bruce McCandless of the United States, makes the 1st untethered space walk.

Tuesday February 7, 1984

Filed Under: → Travel Section

Events

A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

Saturday February 18, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths

Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

Thursday February 23, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths

The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

Monday September 4, 2006

Filed Under: → Deaths