News Thats Used

Friday October 3, 2003

An Indian who was officially dead for 18 years and the scientists who invented Murphy's law were among the winners of the IgNobel Awards.

The awards are a spoof on the Nobel Prizes, celebrated annually in Boston to honor achievements that "cannot or should not be reproduced." They are presented by science humor magazine 'Annals of Improbable Research' and several groups at Harvard and Radcliffe ...

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Albert Einstein was offered the presidency of Israel in 1952, but he declined.

A volcano has enough power to shoot ash as high as 50 km into the atmosphere.

Buttermilk does not contain any butter.

Quips

The Vicar is on vacation. Massages can be given to the Church Secretary.

Filed Under: Church Notices

Our next song is: "Angels We Have Heard Get High."

Filed Under: Church Notices

This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

Filed Under: Church Notices

Fun Book Titles

Apologizing Made Simple
- by Thayer Thorry

My Years in a Lunatic Asylum
- by I. M. Nutty

School Meals
- by R. E. Volting

Neck Exercises
- by G. Rarff

Peek-a-Boo!
- by I. C. Hugh

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Good Question

If fire fighters fight fire and crime fighters fight crime, what do freedom fighters fight?

How long will a floating point operation float?

You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?

Filed Under: Good Question

World Firsts

Autherine Lucy, the 1st black student admitted to University of Alabama, is expelled.

Tuesday February 7, 1956

Filed Under: → Education

France recognizes the United States of America and signs a treaty of aid in Paris; it's the 1st U.S. treaty.

Friday February 6, 1778

Filed Under: → War

Richard Johnson is the 1st Vice President chosen by the United States Senate. It happened during the Van Buren administration.

Wednesday February 8, 1837

Filed Under: → Politics

Events

A father and son in Alabama were killed when they crashed into each other in a head-on collision. Jeffrey Morris Brasher and his son Austin Blaine Brasher of Bankston, Alabama, died early Saturday morning.

Jeffrey Brasher was driving a 2006 Ford pickup and his son was driving a 2004 Chevrolet truck when they collided on a highway head-on, said Alabama State Trooper Jonathon Appling.

Saturday February 18, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths

The man known as the 'Crocodile Hunter' died after his chest was punctured by a stingray barb while diving off Australia's northeast coast. The 44 year-old colourful personality was filming a documentary about the Great Barrier Reef when tragedy struck.

According to friend and colleague, John Stainton, Steve Irwin swam too close to the ray while he was diving off his boat "Croc One" near Batt Reef, northeast of Port Douglas.

Monday September 4, 2006

Filed Under: → Deaths

Relatives of a 91-year-old Ohio woman who died this week are giving her the last word with a sassy, occasionally profane obituary that starts with the basics, "I was born. I lived. I died.", and instructs people to "Wait the appropriate amount of time" before trying to claim her stuff.

They wrote it in Jean Oddi's perspective, recapping the people important to her, adventures she had and her favorite activities, including playing cards and teaching her granddaughter "dirty songs".

Thursday February 23, 2017

Filed Under: → Deaths